A Year Yesterday

October 11th 2011 was a huge bookmark in my life. Some of you may think this date is just like any other, but for me it is a moment in history where my thoughts cleared and my actions changed. A year ago yesterday was the day that I wrote and posted the first ever thing on this blog. It was the first day that I had the courage to say what I thought and put it in a place where anyone and everyone can read it. It was called ‘Starts and Beginnings’ and today I read it again for the first time.

I am not going to lie; it was a bit of a cringe. Like when you watch yourself on video of you in a play when you were at school or an early birthday video and what you thought was a good idea at the time turns out to be hideously embarrassing when you watch it back. It wasn’t quite like that, but my face definitely crumpled a bit. In a strange way, I am proud of it. When I look at it now I have a sense of admiration for how open I was. At that point, I was entering into uncharted territory and I was in essence taking a risk, not knowing what the reaction would be, if there even was a reaction at all.

Now I know that I am a writer. For years, I expressed myself through art, but now I know that my real impression can be made through words. People search for ways to change the world and make their mark, but they don’t understand that those tools are right at their fingertips. All you need to do is say what you feel with utmost honesty, utmost feeling and with conviction – if people agree with you then that is good, but if they criticize you then even better because then you know that they have actually read it. But it doesn’t matter if not even one person clicks on the link, it is like a diary page – people can see it if you get famous or when you are dead, but it will still be its own milestone in time.

It is not always easy. Especially when the subject that you are discussing is really close to home and you feel like your heart isn’t just on your sleeve but on the page. But it is always, always liberating. There are times when I have felt like writing is the last thing that I want to do, but these past few weeks the only thing that my mind has been focused on is this post. They never always follow the flow that I make in my head, but this one seems to be doing the job.

So here I am, one year down the line, putting the flowers of the first anniversary of this blog into a water filled vase. 30 posts later, 300 followers later, 3,000 views later…I am still standing and going strong. This year has without doubt been the most eventful and best year that I have ever experienced – it is a shame that it has come to an end. I am turning around and looking at the journey that I have traveled  It is emotional, but magnificent. But now I can see the horizon in front of me and today I am taking my first steps towards it.


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